In My Element

  Just a quick post today. See, I'm at work. I'm a Medical Assistant and I float from office to office which I love. The one thing I love about my job is that I'm good at it. I love working up patients. I love to keep my doctors happy. I love learning something new-- which is usually everyday. I like to guess at what's wrong with the patient before the doctor sees them and then have my suspicions validated. More than that, I love to feel like I'm doing something worthwhile. The truth of the matter is that I'm pretty much good at anything that I set my mind to but in this area, I excel. At work, I'm in my element.

                                  

                                            
                                                           

  
     It makes me feel very humbled to take care of people. I like that they trust me to care for them and that I can be of assistance when needed or resourceful (if that's what's required). I recall that on my first day of clinical (in Nursing School), I was petrified. I was terrified that I would fall on my face or that some patient would sense my inexperience and refuse to let me assist them. Then, when I met my patient and his wife that day, I felt truly blessed. He was helpless and he relied on me to help him get through his morning. I just remember how honored I felt to be his student nurse for the day. I likened it to the time when Jesus washed his disciples feet. There is no greater honor than to serve and help another in my world. As a matter of fact, I always tell my kids to treat others like they're looking in a mirror. Treat everybody as well as you want them to treat you and treat everybody the same as you treat yourself. That advice has carried me far in life.

    Well, lunch time is over so I'm on to my afternoon patients. Have a great day!

                                                

Black and White

     This morning, as I was on my way to work, I was deep in thought. There's so much more that I want to do with my life. I want to be a nurse, I want to be a better Mommy, I want to be a better person period. I asked God for change and I swear, I'm starting to notice suttle differences within myself and how I think.

     When I was younger, I thought I had the world figured out. Everything was either right or wrong, black or white, yes or no. There really wasn't an in between with me. Now, I've gotten older and I realize that the world isn't what I thought it was. I'm a Mother, whose responsible for a dozen children. I'm a daughter that loves and respects and cares for her mother even though there was abuse for years. I'm a student whose thirsty for knowledge. I'm an employee who cares for her patients like they're family members. I'm a daughter of the Most High and I make mistakes and I am forgiven time and time again. I have so many titles and roles but I tend to get frustrated from time to time.
 
     I think this why I keep praying so much. I want-- no I need-- for God to help me. I want to be a better woman, daughter, Mama, and Christian. I want so much and I'm so impatient. I have got to learn patience. But...things aren't as chaotic as before. I've been spending ALOT of time with my kids. I've been working on menu plans, chore lists, and schedules. God is so good. He answers my prayers and loves me unconditionally. That is all I ask for.

                                                                      Me Previously

Trying My Hand at Something New

I've been tinkering with a little homeschooling this summer. Not because my sister-in-law does it, but because the urge has been there for a long time. Our school system is in upheaval and in school, they teach kids to test instead of just teaching. It's awful because they don't learn anything of any real importance and the value system is awful. In my view, traditional public school is failing miserably. 

Four of My Lils

I've been on different websites pulling material off and teaching the kids. They love it and it gives me time to get closer to them. I'm changing and I want them to be the best at anything they do but I also want them to walk with God everyday of their life. With everything they pick up from other kids at school, I spend a lot of time battling the things that they are bringing home. They're saying and doing things that are inappropriate to me and I just plain don't like it. So, I'm trying something new...

Matthew-Lucas isn't so happy first thing in the morning!

It's next to impossible for me to homeschool full-time right now but the urge is there. A STRONG urge. So much so, that I plan to be a Nurse during the weekends and school my young ones thru the week. That's a big difference from where I saw my career going. I've waited on this for 19 years and now all I want to do is stay home with those babies of mine. Wish me luck!


A day at the Waterpark!



Just a Few Pics of My Littles

This is just a couple of pics that I had in my phone. Love looking at my babies. I LOVE MY BABIES!!!

                   
                          

                                                                

Jesus Take The Wheel

My life is pretty hectic but I wouldn't have it any other way. I have seven daughters, five sons, and one granddaughter. I have a full-time job, a part time job, and I'm a nursing student. I have found that life sometimes gets in the way but the one thing that is constant is God.
  
      When I feel alone...I take my loneliness to him.

     When I just want to give up, He tells me to stay strong and tough it out.

     He doesn't remind me of my mistakes or punish me over and over. He just loves me. He loves us.
    
     Right now, I don't go to church like I want to because I can't seem to find the right one. Other than having 12 kids, I'm a pretty conservative person. My older kids think that their Mama is just down right old fashioned. I can't help it. Some things, I just feel in my bones.
    
     I've been praying that God helps me to become closer to Jesus. I know he's my Savior but I want a personal relationship with him, too. I struggle inside myself everyday to do what's right but it doesn't always work out that way. I'm a work in progress. I listen to a little bit of everything and I love this song by Carrie Underwood called "Jesus Take the Wheel". Inadvertantly, that song is my testimony. It makes me cry everytime I hear it but that's ok. I feel better every time I listen to it.
    
     I was reading my sister-in-law's blog one day and I started to read some of the blogs that she follows. Those women really inspire me. Really inspire me. I don't think that they know how much their simple words and phrases mean to someone like me whose trying to find her way. Really, it was blessing. My favorite one is "Embracing My Cup". Erin's blog is absolutely beautiful and amazing. She seems to live the kind of life that I want.
    
     I have to go now but before I do, I want to leave whoever's reading with a parting thought. I know that life is hard and nobody's perfect. I've gotten to the point where I don't fight that anymore. The one thing, I do know is that God loves each of us no matter what. There's nothing that he won't forgive as long as you repent. Thank God for his saving Grace.      

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

Not Sure Why

I'm having one of those mornings...

The kids are bickering...

I'm running behind schedule....

I have errands to run...

I have to work this afternoon and as a nursing student, I have studying to do.

This is my routine day in and day out. I'm not sure why I chose to have a dozen kids. I'm not sure why I decided to start my career late when I should have done this WAY before. I'm not sure why I take on the impossible. What I am sure of is that God loves me. He has a plan for me and mine. What I'm really sure of is that I CAN and WILL do all things through Christ who strenghtens me.